Sunday, December 16, 2012

Who am I?

This excerpt from a book on creativity caught my eye on Pinterest, of all places.
(from Steal Like an Artist by Austin Kleon; snagged from Brain Pickings)

It wasn't the first admonition that caught me, but the second.

"Don't wait until you know who you are to get started."

That speaks directly to me, blogging. This is the second blog I've started—and the second platform I've started it on. (I started holity on a paid WordPress platform... even though I didn't know who I was. But even the pittance I was paying per month didn't seem reasonable when I didn't know where I was going with it.)

My first blog had a focus that started to feel constricting after a while. Especially when I started doubting the underlying philosophy.

There was a time when I thought I DID know who I was. I wanted to be a fantasy writer. I wanted to write trilogies that rated incredible cover art and made you weep at the beauty.

And yet, immediately upon the appearance of my first published short story, I lost all desire to write fiction. (Therefore, it's still my ONLY published short story.)

I have considered the possibility that I succumbed to mere fear of success, but I think it was more complicated than that. Perhaps I'll detail that sometime.

Ten years later, I find myself still not wanting to write fantasy fiction... I don't even read much of it any more. I have tried a couple of other types of writing. And nothing has stuck yet.

Still, I have this conviction that God gave me this talent for words and He wants me to use it. Not only that, but I'm not content to let this talent lie buried.

I've read articles on how to build a successful blog, and none of them say, "Flounder around trying to find your voice and what you're meant to write about." Nevertheless, that's what I'm going to do here.

If you don't like it, blame it on Austin Kleon.

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